Spend a Couple Hours »Listening to FM Radio (Worst Way to Spend a Couple Hours)

morning fm radioI hadn't listened to FM radio since I worked in a warehouse in Queens. My office was next to an area we called the rape cage, the building was next door to a prison and I worked for horrible men… AND they pumped the top forty station throughout the halls which was the very worst part of all.

Radio has been obsolete for years, but someone forgot to tell the obnoxious men and women who still banter about the battle of the sexes in the mornings. I know of no one that still listens to it, which is crazy if you consider how huge a medium it is, and how important it's been to people in the past.

Bad DJ's, bad music, and Clear Channel Communications have ruined an industry that once mattered, and now people are finding new ways to listen to music, like itunes radio stations and satellite radio.

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Posted on November 12, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »Os Mutantes Live (Best Way to Spend a Couple Hours)

os mutantes posterPick for the week of July 16th
Here's what I said then:

The super duper awesome tropicalia, psychedelic, classic band that I recommended a while back is playing one night at Lincoln Center's Rose Hall this coming Tuesday (the 17th). Not many tickets left, especially since I snagged some for Jim and I, so act quick and enjoy a (hopefully) amazing night of music.

Runner Ups:
Brooklyn Museum
Murray's Cheese and Beer Class
Rowing in Central Park
Amato Opera
Mortified Live

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Posted on November 5, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »Blood Manor

Blood ManorUnlike last year, where they oversold so many tickets that people waited for hours and hours to get in, this year (at least, if you get there at around 8 like we did) you won't have to fear the long lines. Whether or not you have to fear what's inside depends on who you ask; while one member of our team was physically trembling, most teenage boyfriends from New Jersey (who make up most the audience) scoffed when we asked them if it was scary as they exited the building.

It starts with a foul mouthed dead nun, which was more off-putting than terrifying but, unlike a few of the other young actresses further in, I give her credit for staying in character and going all out with her filthy talk. Shortly after that encounter we were hustled into a pitch dark corridor, a good sign, since the same gimmick when employed upstate at the Forest of Fear was possibly the scariest thing I've ever been put through. Other parts that really stood out were the room full of body bags and a lurking monster; a dining room with a real non prosthetic gigantic cannibal (think the gluttony scene from Seven) who sics his pet human on you; and a high anxiety building room with two bloody chainsaw wielding mad men who wait just long enough to freak you out.

There are a few attempts at scares that just fall flat, sometimes to the point that you want to pretend to be scared just to avoid hurting the bloody actress' feelings; and I don't know why they let the autopsy victim do his own routine “Blah, blah blah, hedge funds?!”

Sure, it's cheesy in many ways, but that's what I liked about it so much. Unlike the heady Nightmare house downtown (which was more interesting than scream inducing), this is a traditional classic: guys and girls in makeup, jumping out of the dark, yelling at you and (usually) scaring you pretty good. It's timeless and, for the thirty bucks you spend, the high production values shows. You can disagree if you like, pointing out all the plastic dummies, but I've been to quite a few horror houses in my time and the Citadel Mall certainly never had the attention to detail of moving books on the shelves and misting blood.

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Posted on October 29, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »See Motherboar

MotherboarThis Boston-based metal band is made up of Kenny Irwin, Pete Knipfing, Benny Grotto, Joe Grotto and Brian Connor, who is my friend. But his special status is not the only reason you should stop by their show at Club Europa Oct 23rd!

You should go because, according to them, they possess “supernatural song writing skills, relentless creativity and some of the most killer riffs ever heard.” Even other people are excited: MetalRage.com said “?he M?torhead of stoner has emerged.”

They're newest album, Raise The Death Toll, features a pig lady with an axe on the cover and appropriately equally heavy stuff inside, but seeing them live is the real way to appreciate them.

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Posted on October 22, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »Faerie Con

Faerie Con 2007 We attended the first annual Faerie Con this weekend for a chance to see my mom and dad who were signing books as guests of honor. The original incarnation of the festival, called “Faerie Worlds“, has been celebrated for three years in hippie Oregon and one can't help but feel that the wide open spaces, trees and general vibe of that event were somewhat lost in the translation to a rather depressing airplane hangar-like, florescent lit, conference and expo center right next to the Greyhound Station in Philly.

But people still got dressed up and had fun and, thankfully, the dour location is right across the street from the marvelous Reading Terminal Market too. The convention boasted many vendors of crap with a few standouts: one man made flying dragon figurines out of saw dust (we got one for my dad) and another booth featured really impressive hand-made leather masks that would have been mine if I only had a couple hundred dollars burning a hole in my pocket.

Other artists, aside from my parents, present were the king and queen of the event, Brian and Wendy Froud, most famous for his concept art for the Dark Crystal and Labyrinth (both were shown at midnight during the convention), Holly Black, Charles Vess, and Jean Baptiste Monge and Pascal Mogueron, very nice French artists whose work is rarely seen in the US, so they were a particular treat.

But the big events happen after the booths shut down: Friday night's was the Good Fairy Ball (which we missed) and Saturday's was the Bad Fairy Ball (which we went to). Held at the Trocadero, at first we felt like we were walking onto the Goth Club set of Blade, only to quickly find it defanged when we learned that the bar only served bottled water and peanut M&Ms. Earnest musician Scott Huckabay was performing with his “guitar of peace” which was tuned into the shakra as the laser light show danced around him.

His lengthy performance was followed by a storyteller who looked so much like Zach Galifianakis that, for a moment, I was sure he was pulling off an elaborate joke/performance to my sincerest amazement and respect. It was not Zach. We left before the actual storyteller got to the actual story, he spent a long time exclaiming his genius, and there aren't enough M&Ms in the world to get me high enough to fully enjoy such boasting.

The other attendees were far more enthralling than anything on the stage, with coordinated dances like the Claw and the Victim, the Hoola Hooper and the long beaked man, to name a few. It was great to see such a wide variety of age groups dance and live out their fantasies with such abandonment: the gawky kid in the corner dressed as Puck getting groovy; the bride and count couple swaying to the rhythm of the shakra in their capes; the devil-horned giant man watching all with an imposing stare; the wigged and ancient tranny that was… well, just kind of weirding everyone out; they all seemed so happy to be there.

It's quite a testament to their passion that we were nearly the only people out of place without costumes. Yes, Jim and I found ourselves too cowardly and tired to put on our Renn Faire gear but, to be honest, it would hardly have helped since we lacked both wings and masquerade masks. I think the event is better suited to its original al fresco environment in Oregon, but for all the East Coast faerie lovers, the new location seemed to be greatly appreciated.

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Posted on October 15, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »Hotel Cassiopeia

Hotel Cassiopeia at BAM Part of the Next Wave Festival, this intriguing play based on the life and work of Joseph Cornell is only being performed Oct. 9-13, so I'll have to tell you about it before I get a chance to assure you that it's any good. The set design by Neil Patel and mixed media aspect are what drew me to the production, that and the fact I have yet to see anything at the revered Brooklyn arts center. Hotel Cassiopeia is performed and created by The Siti Company, an ensemble based theater company headed by Anne Bogart.

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Posted on October 8, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »The New Yorker Festival

Jonathan Lethem Every year the New Yorker Festival comes to town and every year all the events I want to see sell out before I think to get tickets. Well, not this year, or at least not entirely. George Saunders with Jonathan Safran Foer and Miranda July with A. M. Homes were sold out right after tickets went on sale, but we snagged seats to see Jonathan Lethem and Karen Russell at The Anthology Film Archives. I'm looking forward to hearing Lethem speak as Lethem gave me two of my best reading experiences this year with 1995's Gun with Occasional Music and 2003's The Fortress of Solitude. The festival runs Oct 5-7 and though I can't guarantee ticket availability, with such names as Jeffrey Eugenides, David Byrne, Errol Morris, Neil LaBute, Steve Martin, Jeff Koons, Oliver Sacks and exciting people being added still, like Judd Apatow and Werner Herzog, any self respecting, slightly snobby, educated reader can find themselves something to get excited about. Don't let this cornucopia of brilliant minds pass you by.

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Posted on October 1, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »The Queens Center Mall

Queens Center Mall in ElmhurstJim and I took a friend here for her big turning thirty gift (I'll tell you about it later), initially, we were just going to head home and come back when she was finished, but we decided to get some exercise by walking the mall and doing something we never do: shopping till we drop. It was actually really fun. I got several pairs of shoes, they have my favorite hoochie cheap shoe store of all time there: Square One! and Jim got new jeans in an updated style for him and a corduroy blazer to complement his hippie English professor look.

The food court is nothing to boast about, and we were a little bummed that our fondly remembered Orange Julius was not there (it may possibly not be anywhere anymore for all I know), but you don't have to worry about food, just hop over to this week's restaurant pick to sate yourself after a long day of being on your feet and spending all that cash. It's a pretty average mall, not too depressing or upscale, but when malls are a rare experience for us city folk, just average is just right.

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Posted on September 24, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »Union Square Market

Union Square Farmer's MarketThis green market began in 1976 when Union Square was known as needle park due to its drug addicts portrayed by Al Pacino. The market and reclamation of the park was the brain child of Barry Benepe, an urban planner, who's son, Adrian Benepe, is the park's commissioner today and was in charge of the recent renovations. The market changed the park into a destination for tourists, locals, and restaurants.

Up to eighty vendors are present selling fresh produce, bread, honey, jams, candles, and fish and meats. The “At the Green market” (see photo) from this week's website pick shows what is currently exciting and available. Both consumers and many chefs take advantage of the market and restaurants will often build their menus around what is available.

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Posted on September 17, 2007

Spend a Couple Hours »B&H

B&H Photo VideoIf you have ever needed to buy film or photo equipment in the city, you surely have visited this mecca. Not only are they almost assured to have what you are looking for (we've found both film and batteries for a twenty year old land camera), they will probably know all about it. You can easily spend an hour or more just taking in all the gadgets and cool stuff you may or may not be able to afford.The conveyer belt system is a modern marvel and worth a visit to see alone. Of course, as you may already be aware, the store is closed most of this month for the high holidays. The store is owned and mostly run by hasidic jews. In fact it's operation is a huge part of the orthodox community, employing hundreds of people. It's become a New York institution after surviving its competitors for thirty years.

ALSO!! I and my fellow travelers have just returned from ye olde Renn Faire and must warn ye that if you shall be wanting to partake in the fun, ye must make haste! It be ending Sept 23. When the crow flies over the mountain. See what fun it be here for thineself.

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Posted on September 10, 2007