It's not like I can use the excuse that we caring New Yorkers bestow on midwesterners who don't know any better. For example, “My aunt Somebody stood in line for 45 minutes for the Times Square Olive Garden. But, she's from Some Town, Some Midwestern state, so she just didn't realize that X, the over priced but chic restaurant just had its soft opening in the village.”

Aren't we great with our condescending sympathy for anyone we feel superior to (read: rest of country, even LA–especially LA). But no one will step up to bat for me if I say something like “So I'm sure you saw it's Shrimpfest night at Red Lobster. You know, I always go in ready to snarf all that shrimp, but I can never say no to the lobster.” It would only elicit blank stares and zero sympathy.

Still, it was my friend Dan (not me) that had one of his birthday parties here. A party that sent a vegetarian friend into vomitous fits after the accidental ingestion of a biscuit that had hidden chunks of meat in it. Didn't he know that if you want to introduce meat you've got to start small–don't go for the good stuff like Red Lobster, such rich flavors need to be worked up to.

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Posted on March 26, 2007

Here lies the spot previously reserved for Mesa Grill, the Bobby Flay spot I had been looking forward to dining at for weeks. In a word: underwhelming! I've had worse: the food itself was okay, but okay is not okay at their prices. I felt cheated by the end of the night and wondered why the place took a month to book a table.

So in its place is a spot that gets it right in all the ways Bobby failed me. First, you never have to get a table, there are none. Second, the Fair price: one sandwich, thickly stuffed will last you two lunches and it only costs $6, plus $1 for tip. Third, a low profile: this literal hole in the wall is run by a former cop and a really nice guy who's missing some teeth and still looks better than Flay.

The atmosphere is literally non existent, there is a tiny sliver of a doorway sized kitchen and a fold out table, but compared to the forced Santa Fe themed mess of Mesa, (they actually painted lovely pre war columns bright green, mustar, and red), a folding table seems quite nice. Fourth, fresh, BOLD flavors: We were all surprised by the lack of kick at Mesa. Connection, however, surprises the pallet with unusual combinations – dill and apple with turkey, pear and smoked gouda with ham.

I usually do not use this blog to air my grievances, but when a sandwich from the corner beats a meal that cost me 75 dollars, my voice must be raised!

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Posted on March 12, 2007

Pylos is exactly the kind of restaurant that lures wealthy, graying upper east and west siders with real “artisan” jewelry and expensive camelhair coats to the once distant downtown neighborhood of the East Village.

They were there in droves, even early on a Thursday we barely got a table and the place stayed steadily busy all night. All for good reason too. The menu is likely unlike most Greek restaurants you've known, offering cornish hen marinated in lemon, orange, cumin and honey; monkfish baked with leeks, chestnuts, prunes and red wine, and cretan _ honey braised lamb shank .

The appetizers are even more alluring and we were fanatical about the cured meat and kasseri cheese stuffed phyllo option we tried. The dessert of crisp phyllo napoleon layered with greek yogurt and sour-cherry mousse was also a smile inducing treat that wasn't too heavy.

The prices are a bit high for the neighborhood, but well worth it for a nice evening out. The atmosphere is unique, with a ceiling made of hanging ceramic pots, which is really quite stunning, and attractive dim lighting. The service is top notch, but when you are finished, you better get a move on as there are going to be hungry diners waiting in the wings.

Pylos is a civilized place not suited to a big group and loud conversation, but you can't expect all those richies to come all the way downtown for anything less.

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Posted on February 26, 2007

That's right, White Castle. For Valentine's Day they're offering candle lit table service by reservation only (I should warn you that I've heard they are already booked). I commend this chain for such a brilliant plan, when fancy restaurants tend to gorge you with mediocre and expensive pre-fixes, don't a few square, steamed burgers over candlelight sound enticing?

If you can't get a reservation, you can always pick up the frozen burgers (an obsession of mine) and light the candles yourself or pick up WC's “Cupid's Crave Kit” which include eight cheeseburgers, one sack of fries, two regular soft drinks, coupons and keepsake items to heat up your homespun romance.

Beware if this is a date and your significant other has no sense of humor and/or you are always a cheap bastard, so instead of seeming like campy fun this just looks like another night out with you.

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Posted on February 12, 2007

Within minutes of this new LES noodle house's soft opening, foodies' ears were to the ground and everyone weighed in with an opinion. Some were good, some were not as good, some were split. Now I weigh in.

The atmosphere is warm and nice despite the fact that we walked in and said to each other “Hmm, I didn't know they had stools”. We are not stool people. They are uncomfortable and make me feel like an infant due to my small stature. But we got over it quickly thanks to the amazingly helpful and courteous service. For a restaurant in NYC, especially one with this much hype, to not only seat you before your party has arrived, but rearrange other guests to accommodate a larger party is phenomenal (although the dudes that had to move one seat down seemed less impressed).

The cocktail list looks impressive, the wasabi Bloody Mary sounded like it would taste more exotic than it did, but it was still satisfactory. To start, we shared a shrimp crepe with coconut and dipping sauce and gobbled it as civilly as we could without making sure not a bean sprout or crumb was wasted. I also struck gold with the Filet Mignon Katiev, a rich spicy soup with extremely tender meat and other goodies. Dana also loved her Kampuchea sandwich that resembled a bahn mi in taste and appearance. At least I assume she loved it because her plate was clean by the time I took a second glance.

Not everything was coming up roses, however. Laura ordered the chicken version of the Katiev and found it to be a bit too oily and Jim, who ordered the meatball sandwich got the pork and left a third of it untouched. It wasn't awful, he said, just not great. So it would seem the trick is ordering the right thing, but if you do, the price is right, the service is friendly and this could just be another staple among LES restaurant options.

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Posted on January 29, 2007